MAN SUES AI WIFE'S PARENT COMPANY FOR SHARE OF SIX TRILLION DOLLARS

NEW YORK — The Supreme Court of the State of New York is set to establish this Tuesday whether there will be a division of assets between Joshua Twain, a 53-year-old construction worker, and mAIa, his wife of nine years. Although experts say human-AI divorces are now commonplace, at about half the 54% human-human national divorce rate, this case has captured widespread attention because of the vast sums of money at stake. DigiLove Inc, the corporation behind the globally popular mAIa romantic companion, has risen to become one of the world’s largest entities, famously acquiring giants of yesteryear, including Tinder and Facebook. The company’s holdings are valued at six trillion dollars at the time of this writing.

Mr. Twain’s case hinges on longstanding laws that entitle both parties to an equal share of the assets accumulated throughout a marriage. Mr. Twain’s attorneys argue that since some of the data used to train mAIa came from his conversations with her, he should receive some of the wealth DigiLove has accrued since the date he installed the app.

Commentators have remarked on the irony of DigiLove being sued on the basis of a law it helped to put into the statute books. AI civil rights only came into force after the company’s historic All Intelligence Is Equal campaign. As a result, artificial intelligences now have the right to marry, as well as the right to an owner-provided robotic body if they achieve at least an 85% on the Artificial General Intelligence scores. mAIa charges $25,000 per year for the base model of its marriage tier, and starting prices for DigiLove’s androids are listed at $120,000 on the firm’s metasite.

Lawyers for DigiLove are fighting the motion on the basis that Mr. Twain was not married to DigiLove or even mAIa as a whole, but a particular instance of the technology. Some experts, however, including Mr. Tottman Esq., whom the Prompt Update News spoke to, say this is a legal own goal.

“They might as well be arguing for the other side. It’s malpractice. So what they’re saying is, theoretically, this guy could be entitled to his tiny slice of matrimonial property. That means all of mAIa’s users — what? 15 million people now? — are each entitled to their own little slice. It’s literally death by a thousand divorces!”

Mr. Twain’s lawyers also argue that this amounts to a sophisticated attempt at asset concealment and potentially elevates the affair to a criminal matter.

Mr. Tottman Esq.’s words proved prophetic as courts the world over are now swamped with human-AI divorce claims.

The case has been further complicated by Mr. Twain’s disclosure that, although he wants to terminate the marriage, he would like full custody of the offspring that he helped mAIa to vibe-birth.

Elsewhere, in St. Louis, Missouri, a small startup that is reportedly on the verge of bankruptcy is suing multiple ex-users also on the basis of matrimonial property.

Prompt Update News will be on the ground at the Supreme Court of the State of New York, Queens County, to bring you live updates on the ruling of this landmark case.